my vet gave me this book about cats and it’s so weird
the title of this chapter is “how to walk your cat”
get your cat another cat so you never have to play with it again
then get that cat a cat
keep getting cats to avoid interaction with anything
this is your life now
i just… i don’t even know
is there a difference between alert and attentive???? apparently there is and apparently it’s important enough to put in a book and label??
and last but not least, don’t forget to get your cat utensils so they can eat their food like fucking ladies
this is an actual real live picture someone tweeted teenage boys can literally not stop whining
*insert joke about satanism here*
i have seen the future and this will never be okay
IT WAS THE MSOT BULLSHIT DEATH HIS POWER WAS LITERALLY SURVIVAL HE WAS ABLE TO SURVIVE SHIT
my friends: lets go into the city tonight! does that sound good with everybody
me like ‘haha yeah i can DEFINITELY write a five page paper in two hours!! time is a construct, deadlines have no meaning and also i’m dead inside’
IF YOU’RE UP AND OPERATING ON LESS THAN FOUR HOURS OF SLEEP CAN I GET A HELL no
What type of cat do you have?
i don’t know! she’s a rescue but the doc says she might be siamese-y
West Virginia. The butthole of America.